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1001 First Lines

~ It was the best of lines, it was the worst of lines.

1001 First Lines

Monthly Archives: September 2012

First Lines with author Jackson Burnett

26 Wednesday Sep 2012

Posted by Scarlett in Interview

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1. Do you consider the first line to be an important part of a story? If so, why?

The first line of a novel reveals the skill of the writer and signals the type of story ahead. Epics often begin with the presentation of something big. Writers who want their readers involved in the narrative often start with action. It’s not unusual for an author who wants to challenge the reader to present a puzzle.

2. Do you find first lines easy to come up with, or challenging? Do you have a technique, or a ritual, that you go by to make it easy?

A story always begins at an arbitrary place and time. I often find my first line after I’ve already written hundreds of words. I just throw those out or find another place else to put them. Sometimes a first line comes like a dream. It’s just there.

3. What consequences, if any, do you think there are in having a badly written first line?

A poorly written first line won’t doom a big concept novel, but it’s like baseball; it’s a first strike against the book. A foul first sentence in a book read for fun ends up in my unread pile unless it’s a wonderfully bad line. “The Rocky Horror Show,” for example, is resplendent with terrible lines and it continues to be popular decades after its release.

4. What’s your favourite first line that you’ve ever read? And can you recall a worst?

This is my favorite:

I am doomed to remember a boy with a wrecked voice.

John Irving, A Prayer for Owen Meany

This is one of the worst:

Swenson waits for his students to complete their private rituals, adjusting zippers and caps, arranging pens and notebooks so painstakingly chosen to express their tender young selves, the fidgety ballets that signal their weekly submission and reaffirm the social compact to be stuck in this room for an hour without real food or TV.

Francine Prose, Blue Angel

This first line is terrible because it uses so many words to say so little. Prose’s first line actually begins with the last sentence of her first paragraph:

Is it my imagination, or have we been seeing an awful lot of stories about humans having sex with animals?

(the middle aged professor asks his students)
Francine Prose, Blue Angel

Prose should have cut that first line, eliminated the rest of her first paragraph, and started the novel with this question. The point she makes with her beginning could have been worked into the rest of the story.

5. What is one of your own best first lines?

The image shimmered, then burned.

Jackson Burnett, The Past Never Ends

6. We’re all sharing here! What’s one of your worst first lines?

As emotion washed over her, Wanda gingerly looked at her left boob on her chest right above the bottom rib bone on her left side and wondered where it came from.

Jackson Burnett

This first sentence was never published, but it is similar to some, I’m sure, that have been discarded into the ether. The only thing that saves this line from being complete dog food is the question of what “it” is: Does Wanda wonder where her boob came from or is “it” something else?

7. What are some things a first line *shouldn’t* be? What are some things that you’ve read in first lines that really rubs you the wrong way?

The Wanda sentence from my last answer demonstrates everything wrong a writer can do to start a story. The line includes a cliche, an unnecessary and inappropriate adverb, and unimportant details. For some readers, it would be offensive as well.

8. Do you have any suggestions for other authors on how to write a great first line? Have you heard any great advice yourself?

Don’t wait for a great first line to begin writing a story. You’ll find it or it will find you.

Jackson Burnett is the author of The Past Never Ends, a newly published legal mystery from Deadly Niche Press. A sometimes teacher of creative writing, Burnett enjoys Italian opera, the roller derby, and reading trashy novels. He also writes short literary fiction and essays. His prose has been compared to that of Raymond Chandler, Sarah Vowell, and Garrison Keillor among others.

Visit with Burnett at the Facebook page for The Past Never Ends: https://www.facebook.com/pages/The-Past-Never-Ends-by-Jackson-Burnett/302973386467969

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First Lines interview with author Adam Graham

24 Monday Sep 2012

Posted by Scarlett in Interview

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1. Do you consider the first line to be an important part of a story? If so, why?

It’s important because you need to grab your reader’s attention. There’s so much material out there, you can’t afford to start off dull. If you don’t grab the reader’s attention, you’re dead.

2. Do you find first lines easy to come up with, or challenging? Do you have a technique, or a ritual, that you go by to make it easy?

The first line is easy. It’s the other several thousand that need work. Much of it comes back to my journalism training. I learned about the inverted pyramid, which was used by reporters when space restrictions were a firm absolute. When people read newspapers, they don’t read everything. You have to get the key points in the first few paragraphs to keep them reading. Plus, it helps news editors cut the story if they don’t have room. Sadly, many news writers and commentators without editors harping on them have entirely forgotten the point.

3. What consequences, if any, do you think there are in having a badly written first line?

It’ll make it harder to sell. You need either a great description or great reviews to overcome boring your readers from the get go.

4. What’s your favourite first line that you’ve ever read? And can you recall a worst?

The best:

Marley was dead: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that.

-The Christmas Carol

How can it get better than that? You are completely hooked on that first line It sets a tone for the story that is mysterious, haunting, and makes you want to read more.

The worst is a bit harder. As I think the worst opening lines don’t grab your attention, they also don’t stay in your mind. The worst beginnings are laden with actions we don’t care about, descriptions of people we don’t know, dry and uninteresting back story. Such beginnings remind me of a scene in Casablanca where Peter Lorre’s character says, “You despise me, don’t you?” Bogart’s Character, Rick responds, “If I gave you any thought I probably would.”

5. What is one of your own best first lines?

Superman fell from the sky, collided with a skyscraper, and bounced off as it toppled.

This is from my novel, Tales of the Dim Knight. The Superman is actually an action figure, but it grabs the reader’s attention and sets the reader’s expectation for the Superhero action that’s to follow later on.

6. We’re all sharing here! What’s one of your worst first lines?

Everything’s fine. It’s always fine with me. Ask me how I’m doing after a plane carrying all of my loved ones on it crashed into the sea, and I’ll tell you. “I’m fine.”

This is from a forever unfinished novel I began when I was 21. It was attempting to be angsty and sarcastic but came off a little too whiny and the first line sets the tone. It still grabs attention, but not in a great way. Ugh. Remember, you asked for it.

7. What are some things a first line *shouldn’t* be? What are some things that you’ve read in first lines that really rubs you the wrong way?

It shouldn’t give us a bunch of information we don’t care about and until we’re drawn into the story, we won’t care about any of it. I’d also add that I’m not a fan of beginning with a profanity or with sex. You may capture our attention with that, but it’s a kind of lowest common denominator approach that’s really cheating

8. Do you have any suggestions for other authors on how to write a great first line? Have you heard any great advice yourself?

Understand that you need to capture your reader’s attention. What are your readers looking for? Are they looking for a character to empathize with? Are they hungry for heart stopping action? A mystery? Figure out what to bait to use to lure your readers in to your story. If you lose them on the first line, you’ve lost them.

Adam Graham is the author of the novel Tales of the Dim Knight and has just published the first of eight novella sequels with Powerhouse Flies Again. He’s also working on a mystery novel entitled Slime Incorporated. He’s the host of The Great Detectives of Old Time Radio and Old Time Radio Superman podcasts. He lives in Boise with his wife and co-author Andrea. http://laserandsword.com

First Lines interview with author R. W. Peake

19 Wednesday Sep 2012

Posted by Scarlett in Interview

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1. Do you consider the first line to be an important part of a story? If so, why?

Absolutely. I think that first line sets the tone for what’s to come; it grabs (or doesn’t) the reader’s attention and gets them invested enough to read on. While I think that there’s value in a more subtle approach, where the suspense, or the drama or whatever the author is going for, builds slowly, I for one ain’t very subtle. I prefer an opening line that somehow strikes a chord with a reader. Whether it’s through an emotion or action that the reader identifies with, or it feels like a punch in the gut, but in a good way, that first line to me makes all the difference.

 2. Do you find first lines easy to come up with, or challenging? Do you have a technique, or a ritual, that you go by to make it easy?

I know this will sound like bragging, but I find it very easy to come up with a first line that, from everything I’ve been told by the various readers of those lines, grabs the reader’s attention and gets them engaged early on. But that has actually been something of a curse for me. Here I am  in my 50’s, a newly minted published author, but it wasn’t until 2006 that I could actually think of myself as a true writer, because for the first time I actually put something to go along with the first line. I’ve been pushed to be a writer for as long as I can remember, but for a variety of reasons, none of them really any good, I preferred to ignore the one area where I seem to have the most talent.

Except in the period between when I wrote my first “novel” at the age of 10, roughly 1969 and 2006, that desire to write would come bubbling up, and I would sit down with a story in mind, and then I would crank out a first line to start. Then, I might add a few paragraphs, and in a couple of other cases, a fair number of pages. In short, I was a GREAT starter. Not so great on finishing, however. And I think part of that stems from the fact that it is easy for me to think of a good first line.

As far as technique? I wish I could tell you I had one, but I don’t. I have a vague story idea; sometimes it’s even more than vague, the story arc being fully formed in my head, with a beginning and at least an end. Based on whatever that idea was, I would write a first line that followed the general guideline I set out earlier, trying to grab the reader’s attention.

 3. What consequences, if any, do you think there are in having a badly written first line? 

With any book, there’s a sort of contract between the author and reader. The author promises to deliver a story that the reader will find engaging, and if they live up to that, the reader more or less promises to stick with that author even when there might be a paragraph, or page that lags a bit. But with a badly written first line, the terms of that contract suddenly tilt into the reader’s favor, because the burden of proof that the author will live up to the terms of that contract just became much, much larger. Essentially, with that first badly written line, the author now has a hole to climb out of in order to deliver the goods, as it were. If that’s followed up by another one, or one after that, the burden becomes inestimably higher.

Like any author, I’m an avid reader as well, and I think every reader has had an experience with a book where the only thing that keeps you plodding on is the fact that you spent a certain amount of money on the title, and the hope that somewhere in the pages ahead, you’ll recoup your investment. So you read on with the grim determination of a musher in the Iditarod who’s racing through a blizzard, determined that you’re going to get something out of this, damn it!

No author wants their reader to feel that way. And, truth be known, in this digital age where books are only a couple of bucks, or even (gulp) free, that determination to get some sort of payoff is even more short-lived.

 4. What’s your favourite first line that you’ve ever read? And can you recall a worst? 

 It was dark and cold, the only light coming from the crack under the ill-fitting door.

As first lines go, in and of itself it’s not great literature, but it’s the first line of “Reilly’s Luck”, by Louis L’Amour, the first of his books that I’ve read, beginning a lifelong love affair with his works, and with an author who was not only a huge influence on me as a writer, but whose hard-boiled, pragmatic outlook served as the kind of wisdom that a young boy without a father needed. Even now, after reading every one of his books, I still rank Reilly’s Luck as my favorite, and one of his best. Will Reilly taught me more on how to be a man than any other single influence in my life, which is probably a somewhat sad statement, but is true nonetheless.

Worst line? Nah. Honestly I can’t remember any line that sticks out so much that I can recite it. Unless it’s Snoopy’s classic, “It was a dark and stormy night.”

 5. What is one of your own best first lines?

Well, that’s kind of tough; which one of your kids do you love the most? And I will say that with Marching With Caesar-Conquest of Gaul (available on Amazon.com. Barnesandnoble.com, and smashwords.com, not that I’m shilling my book or anything), I’ve been fortunate to receive a large number of reviews in a relatively short period of time, and the response has been more positive than I could have dreamed. But one common theme in the reviews has been, “I was hooked from the first line.”

So I guess that should mean I would put that one down. But there’s another one, from the book I completed in 2006 that, according to about the 30-odd people who have read it, would seem to be my best one. I will say that it’s the line that means the most to me, for a number of reasons, not least of which is that it got some significant interest from three different agents. However, at the last minute I decided to withdraw the book from consideration, because of the pain it would cause people I love a great deal. Ultimately, I think of all the books I write, it will be this book that I will point to and say, “THAT is the one I want to be known by.” But I will have to wait until a later time so that what might be my best book doesn’t cause the most heartache.

With that in mind, here it is:

 I was conceived in desperation and born in anger, spat out of my mother’s womb as a guided missile, with a target and a mission that I neither chose nor even understood until it was too late.

More than one of my readers likened this to being punched in the stomach. While I don’t know if it’s a good thing or a bad thing, I do know that it kept them reading.

 6. We’re all sharing here! What’s one of your worst first lines? 

Okay, my worst first line is burned into my memory, mainly because it was my very FIRST first line. When I was 10, I wrote a “novel” about the Soviet invasion of the U.S……..focused entirely on my street, in Houston, Texas. Yes, the entire effort of the dirty Commies’ attempt to crush the good ol’ U.S. of A. came right down my street.

And it would have been successful too, but they just happened to pick the wrong bunch of 10 year olds, as we singlehandedly fought the might of the Soviet horde, armed with WWII-vintage weapons (that was the period of history I was obsessed with at that time) to a standstill.

So with that in mind, I present to you my very first, and my very worst first line. (Audible gulp)

 This was no game, this was war!!!!!!

(I think it was six exclamation points, but it could have been more. That’s how the reader knew it was a very serious situation and I wasn’t just kidding around.)

 7. What are some things a first line *shouldn’t* be? What are some things that you’ve read in first lines that really rubs you the wrong way?

Uh, it shouldn’t be bad? Sorry, can’t resist the occasional smartass comment. Although I haven’t given the matter a whole lot of deep thought, I have some immediate observations and ideas that bubble up. And while I can’t immediately point to any specific first line in any first book, I think that others will understand what I’m saying.

I don’t think a first line should be an attempt by the author to dazzle the reader with their literary brilliance. No matter what the subject matter is, any work, whether it’s one of “literary fiction” (whatever the hell that means) or stories of the zombie apocalypse mashed up with fairies and elves, the author is telling a story. And any first line that doesn’t serve as the first building block of that story is one of those things that shouldn’t happen.

I’ve seen too many cases where the author seeks to show his chops at crafting a sentence that I’m sure in his mind will be the first thing that’s mentioned in his Pulitzer Prize citation, yet has no real connection to the story. To me, it’s a form of the “smartest guy in the room” syndrome, where the author is more concerned with showing off and not in telling a story.

Yeah, I guess that does rub me the wrong way.

 8. Do you have any suggestions for other authors on how to write a great first line? Have you heard any great advice yourself?

Don’t take this the wrong way, but of all the questions I get, I hate those that ask me for some sort of advice to pass on to other writers. Although it has nothing to do with not giving away any “trade secrets” that I see some other writers cite, since I don’t view other writers as competition as much as I do colleagues, it’s more about who am I to give advice? Like a lot of other “indie” authors, I’m self-published, but unlike some of my colleagues I don’t mind saying I’m self-published, but that probably has more to do with the fact that my book is selling well, especially for a self-published first attempt. The fact that I didn’t try to find a publisher very hard and after surveying the landscape decided that I could make a go of it on my own has something to do with it as well.

Even so, I’m somewhat leery of offering advice simply because I could be a one-hit wonder, and I AM self-published when all is said and done. With all that said, I guess all I can really offer is, go with your gut. You know what resonates with you as a reader; you also know what doesn’t. What captures your attention when you read a book? What are the elements that captivate you in the first line of a story?

Once you identify that, then do that.

As far as advice I’ve heard, I can’t really recall anything. Sorry.

Marching With Caesar-Conquest of Gaul by R. W. PeakeMarching With Caesar-Conquest of Gaul is a first-person narrative, written in the form of a memoir as dictated to a scribe of Titus Pullus, Legionary, Optio, First Spear Centurion of Caesar’s 6th and 10th Legion. The memoir is written three years after his retirement as Camp Prefect, when Titus is 61 years old. 

Titus, along with his boyhood friend Vibius Domitius, joins the 10th Legion in the draft of 61 BC, when Gaius Julius Caesar is the governor of Spain. Titus and Vibius are assigned to a tent group, with seven other men who will become their closest friends during their times in the legion. Titus, Vibius and their comrades endure the harsh training regimen that made the legions the most feared military force in the ancient world. The 10th Legion is blooded in a series of actions in Spain, led by Caesar in a campaign that was the true beginning of one of the most brilliant military careers in history.

Three years after joining the legions, the 10th is called on again, this time to be part of the subjugation of Gaul, one of the greatest feats of arms in any period of history. During the subsequent campaigns, the 10th cements its reputation as Caesar’s most favored and trusted legion, and is involved in most of the major actions during this period.

This first book of a completed trilogy closes with Caesar crossing the Rubicon, and the 10th preparing to march to war, this time against fellow Romans.

Connect with RW Peake on Twitter & Facebook
Website http://www.marchingwithcaesar.com/

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Scarlett Rugers (writing as Scarlett Archer) is a book cover designer located in Melbourne Australia. She has been a designer for over six years, and is a published author with more than fifteen years of writing under her belt. Her expertise is working specifically with self-published authors.

Writing, under the pen name Scarlett Archer: scarlettarcher.com

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